Whole50 Results, Comic-Con, and Other Thoughts

Well, I lost 10 pounds on my Whole50.

I was 10 lbs short of my Whole50 goal, and to be honest, I was more confused than disappointed. I mean, how do you lose 15 lbs in 45 days, then only 10 lbs in 50 days following the same eating plan and doing MORE physical exercise?...

But, I swallowed my bad feelings and had a fun (chaotic!) time at Comic-Con. I cut loose on food and booze and wasn't feeling too hot on the second day, let me tell you.

We visited the Pendragon costume booth, where they make beautiful corsets and corset dresses, and an overbust corset with the pattern of Kaylee's parasol (from Firefly) caught my eye. It was in a size much too small for me, so I chatted with the costumers and tried on a couple of other pieces (including a cool Haunted Mansion pattern!). They kept going down in size, because we couldn't figure out what fit me best. In the end, the lady fitting me said "I think I actually want to try you in THIS size" (the size of the parasol corset). The one I was wearing (already 12 sizes -!!!- smaller than what I'd thought I was) fit fine and could be cinched in tighter, but since I told her I was planning on losing about 60 more pounds overall, she said going one more size down was safer and would allow for more adjustments as I went.

We tried on the Kaylee corset. IT FIT. It made my waist look much smaller and, even though my upper back and boobs were kind of bulging out at the top, it actually looked really good.

I didn't get a photo of me in the corset, but here's the pattern (as well as the necklace and patches I bought from the California Browncoats booth to help me build a cosplay around it).

The yellow fabric on top is a cute shrug I plan on wearing under the corset, at least until I get the "back bulge" under control

I also tried on a corset dress in a pretty Belle blue, and that fit nicely and gave me awesome ideas for cosplay, but it was a little too pricey for me so I'm going to wait until next year.

So. I do feel better and I definitely concede the health benefits of a Whole30 (or -45 or -50), but as far as straight up weight loss I have not been seeing the results I would like, so I am going to make some adjustments for myself. Specifically:

1. For the next (30-day) program I undertake after my birthday, I will go back on a Whole30 eating plan with the following tweaks.
1. No white potatoes
2. No sweet potatoes (I absolutely agree both of these things are good for you, but I will be reducing my intake os starches overall in order to lose more weight)
3. Limiting fruit intake to 1 or 2 items a day, and making sure those are lower in sugar, namely berries and canteloupe (I love dates, I really do...but they are VERY sugary)
4. No coconut water (again, I think this is a healthy food, but it has a lot more natural sugar than plain water and also it's really to expensive to drink on a regular basis)
2. I will keep the following tenets of the program the same
1. No alcohol
2. No dairy (I considered adding cheese back in, since it's not really "bad" for you, but I found I didn't really miss it on a Whole30 and I tend to overindulge on it anyway)
3. No refined sugars or sweeteners (again, I considered allowing Splenda, but to be honest it's probably healthier to just avoid the artificial sweeteners altogether)
4. No grains
5. No legumes...although I don't believe they're really bad for you, I haven't missed them while on Whole30. I get lots of protein from the meat I eat, and cutting out the additional starches can't hurt in a weight loss campaign.
6. Focusing on lots of vegetables, meat and eggs, and definitely focusing on home-cooked food.
7. Daily exercise (I think I should take a daily walk at lunch to get my 10K steps in on the FitBit - packing my lunch and eating at my desk will ave some time!)

Because it's (extremely) likely I gained back that 10-lb loss in the past few days eating junk food, I'll be taking it extra easy in the next couple of days, drinking water, allowing treats but getting back into the good-food habit, so I'm not starting off a mile behind on the 18th (program will be July 18th through August 16th and will include TWO friends' weddings, so it'll be an exercise in declining temptations and enjoying other things besides food, like the company of good friends and the rehearsal process for Spelling Bee).

Do I wish the whole process was faster? OF COURSE I DO. Even more so, I wish I'd been eating healthfully and exercising my whole life so I wasn't starting off with so much to change. BUT. It's important to focus on the following:

• I'm 76 lbs down from my highest (recorded) weight, and 45 lbs down from the beginning of this year when this whole Whole30 adventure began. That's not insignificant, especially for someone like me whose life looks like a series of "Before" photos
• I was emptying the iPhoto "trash" on my computer and found a "hard truth" picture I'd taken of myself at my highest weight, and I can absolutely see a difference in my size and in the look on my face.
• I am finding foods that I love and enjoy that are also healthy for me and can help me in succeeding with weight loss. Food isn't the enemy, and I like that this is a positive process and not a negative shaming one.
• I have less than 100lbs to go until I hit my overall goal weight. Next milestone goal is only 10 lbs away, which I truly believe I can accomplish in the 30 day program I have coming up.
• Kaylee corset
• Fun things in the pipeline, not the least of which is Spelling Bee and my new job in marketing which will give me things to focus on other than food and my fat ass, haha

You know what, screw it: I have been avoiding numbers on here and photos of myself because I am terrified of the reaction (scorn, pity, whatever) but I'm resolving to be more brave and to embrace myself THROUGHOUT this process. 

Goal for Whole50 was to get under 200 pounds. I finished at 209. That's why a 10lb weight loss still felt like such a failure. And, I haven't seen the light side of 200 for almost 10 years now. 

Overall goal is 150 lbs (although I'll likely reevaluate throughout - I was 160 at my lightest in college and while I wasn't skinny by any means, I was healthy and limber and pretty happy with how I looked).

So now you know. Oh, and here's me trying on the Belle dress at Pendragon (with Rainbow Brite and Buddy Blue):

One day I'll be as well-coordinated as these fabulous ladies

No more shame or hiding. I may not be close to where I want to be, but I'm proud of myself for making it this far. And I'm going to keep on working, and taking care of myself, and enjoying my life.

Slaínte. :-)